Understanding your Victim Part

What is covered in the Workshop?

Join this Introductory Workshop to Learn more about:
• What the Victim Part Looks and Feels like,
• How the Victim Part is made
• How did the Victim Part save me?
• What the Victim Parts Beliefs are
• What does the Victim Part Want?
• Understand how the Victim Part in linked to the Inner Critic
• Which other Parts does it impact?
• What does the Victim Part need to heal?
• How can the Victim Part Support us in our Journey to Health?
• Speak with your Victim Part to start the process of healing this part

Additional Q&A Session

0.00 Welcome

00.16 Does it matter if I cannot do a “real” yawn?

01.16 How do I know if it’s ok to take a belief to the accelerator if it is one held by a part? I have a concern that this may detract from building the trust and healing with the part but I may be over thinking things and/or be projecting.

03.21 I lost two friends. They seemed to be good friends, but “suddenly” it all fell apart, surprisingly enough, the loss of these friends doesn’t feel like a loss, but feels like a relief. Reflecting upon this, I saw an unhealthy aspect in the relationships, namely, they were actually based on two victim parts interacting each other, and needing each other, a co-dependency. This prevented them from being healed and accepted. Now that I’m able to take care of my own parts much better, I suddenly get agitated when other people subconsciously want me to take care of them and rescue them and whenever I feel that energy I want to run. Does this feeding of two victim parts happen often and how does it work and why does it happen?

12.47 I do a lot of sabotaging behaviors. For instance I like drinking soda, my favorite being coca cola. I keep trying to drink more water because it’s healthier but I do always go back to doing that unhealthy behavior. Is this the victim part? A lot of times I feel bad that i did that sabotaging behavior and my inner critic comes out and I feel really bad. Other times after the inner critic comes out I say things like oh it’s no big deal, even healthy people drink soda. That’s something that I really enjoy. I think that the last part may be the victim part but not sure.

19.21 You said about acknowledging your victim part. Many years ago I was totally living my victim part, I was constantly venting to my mother about all my health problems. I was acknowledging that part constantly! So, how do you find the balance in acknowledging the victim part while not overdoing it and “playing victim?”

22.06 I started crying as soon as I started the exercise, and through the entire thing. This happens to me almost when I meditate as well, as if as soon as I relax and quiet my mind there’s all this sadness just waiting to come out. I tend to think of this as positive, that it’s good to feel and release the sadness, but I’ve been doing the program for almost 3 years now and I wonder if I’m ever going to get past this crying. Do I just keep on going or is there something else I should do to address this ever-present sadness?

27.17 I didn’t quite get who the Victim part really is… So I couldn’t connect at all during the exercise.Could you give some practical examples of behaviors or thoughts that come from the Victim?

35.02 Can I do e.g. alternate nostril breathing for the exercise, or does the technique have to be done during the exercise?

36.02 I find it difficult to really empathize with healthy people, people who are not housebound like me or are NOT in a lot of pain (physical or emotional).
Is this (only) the victim part and how do I help this part grow?

40.56 In the exercise where you sit with the feeling and wait for it to ease I have a tight feeling around my body the whole time and I can’t move properly for it and am bedridden. It feels like hurt feelings stuck in my body as well as fear. Do I just sit with it a few times a day like you suggested and eventually it will shift.

43.58 The victim part has a tendency to take things personally and hold grudges. How do I deal with that? I have fear of criticism, fear of love because it hurts, fear of being abandoned not pleasing people and ending up alone. Do I just acknowledge these feelings and they will gradually go?

49.11 How might the victim and the protector be interacting in blocking progress?

52.06 What affirmations might you give to the victim?

53.13 I think my achiever rescued the victim from her past by being active, but because achiever is held back from having the condition what other ways can I help the victim feel rescued without the achiever pushing too hard?

55.05 I had understood my victim part to encourage me towards bad habits therefore prevent me recovering. I thought that she was created at a time when I was vulnerable. Encouraging me with unhealthy habits means that I will not get well. Had I got this completely wrong?

57.17 You mentioned the victim part is created from birth. Why would that be?

58.23 You mentioned there was an unhealthy aspect which is the victim and there was a healthy aspect but what is the healthy aspect?

58.54 Regarding the victim workshop I’m finding it very difficult to have any connection with this part. I don’t feel hopelessness helplessness or empowered. I don’t feel any of the things that you mention. Don’t remember being criticised or punished when I was small. Did not get ill for attention. My thoughts on my victim part is always when I’m reacting that thoughts come up constantly about all the wrongs everybody has done me. I dwell on them and think it’s so hurtful what xyz has done. How I can’t make them see how wrong they were and how I can’t go back and say what I should have said to justify my case. Is this the victim part or have I got it wrong. If it is the victim part I have no connection to it at all. I cannot seem to work with part. What do you suggest I should do to get closer to this part.

1.03.37 When validating my part I notice I sometimes switch to identifying with it and then lose myself in it. Any advice?

1.05.01 My parts, especially my victim, really want my attention a lot throughout the day. It is exhausting. Any advice on boundaries? I tried talking to them (usually Inner Critic, Victim, Perfectionist) and saying that I really want to be with them but need rest to do that. It only seems to work for sleeping at night.

1.08.29 I have a part called friend that I feel is a victim part but also is made up of other parts. Does it matter? Do I just work on the victim feelings?

1.09.30 In order to rescue, heal my Victim, do I need to work with my Inner Critic first?

1.10.27 You discussed setting boundaries during your workshop. Is this particularly linked with the Victim part?

1.12.12 I wondered how you gathered the info on Parts. I imagine it is mostly through your own journey with them, coaching and Gupta training, but if there are any other resources you can recommend which have useful information around Parts, I’d love to hear.

1.16.41 Conclusion

1.18.08 What’s Next – Other Workshops

1.21.36 Feedback